The Dummy vs. Mummy

I knew it was only a matter of time before I came to write this blog. I wanted to wait until I could hand on heart say the dummy was forever gone before writing it. How dramatic…but I need to set the scene for this story.

Very early on in Clyde’s life we introduced a dummy. I was in the same mind space as many parents at the start; asking myself if I should, if it would impact us establishing breastfeeding, if it would affect Clyde’s teeth/mouth or speech development however, Clyde was feeding off me constantly, it was relentless and it was my health visitor who actually spoke some real truths to me and gave me the confidence to make the decision for myself rather than what I thought others thought I should do (thank you Kirsty ).

Needless to say my love for that dummy was as great as Clyde’s, if not more in those early months. My nipples were also pretty happy as they were getting somewhat of a break between our feeds. Clyde took to the dummy like a duck to water. He loved it from the start. It’s soothed him, helped him snooze, aided him during countless new teeth coming through and has been a life saver for me and dad when there has been meltdowns. Nothing calmed Clyde quite like a cold dummy. 

So where did it all go wrong? We had a few wobbles along the way. From having to pop it in every time it fell out (oh, I’ll never forget those broken nights sleeps), to going in and out of his room multiple times all nigh to pick up the 704th dummy that had been lobbed out of the cot to finally, at 19 months, the last straw came from the meltdowns, the Oscar winning performances that occurred from Clyde trying to get his dummy, shouting for his dummy or not getting his dummy. This was during the day when he never got his dummy (he only got it from naps or if he was struggling with teething or was unwell). 

It went from bad to worse in a few weeks and I just couldn’t do it anymore. It was causing more pain than joy and I wanted it gone. Clyde on the other hand, he wasn’t for that idea. So, with every brave bone in my body and trying to embrace all the advice I give other parents, I decided we were going cold turkey and the dummy was going. For good!

And that is exactly what we did. We decided the day and ensure we choose a week we were going to be at home with no big events planned. We then threw all dummy’s out. Every. Last. One. Full disclaimer. I’m not lying, I was terrified. Clyde’s connection to that dummy proved way greater than I’d given credit for and well, I wasn’t sure what was coming.

So it wasn’t great but it also wasn’t awful. He nailed naps, not really bothering that he didn’t have it and going down to bed was the same, he spent a few minutes looking for it and then fell asleep. He did however wake a few times nights 1-3 and was really upset (this never happens). We actually had to take him out of his room, cuddle him on the couch and then he would settle and ask for bed again. Like I always say to other parents when supporting them through this, our little ones often surprise us. Clyde really done way better than I’d imagined or gave him credit for. 

Days weren’t great though. He hung to the fridge (where his dummy’s used to live) like a seagull on chips at the seaside. He screamed lots when looking for them, had some really tough meltdowns when not being able to totally understand why he couldn’t get them (this broke my heart a little but I knew we were doing the right thing) and spent a lot of time trying to find them. A lot of time. One of the cutest parts was him asking his teddies where it was. He didn’t think this was cute mind you!

We are now almost 2 weeks with no dummy and it’s brilliant. We don’t get the fear thinking we’ve forgotten them, the meltdowns during the day have stopped (well the ones related to the dummy) and I don’t have to pick any up from the floor early morning in the risk of an early wake. The time came naturally for us to say goodbye. I’m so glad we had an overall positive experience with it however I am so glad that from here forward, the dummy is no longer part of our family. Thanks for the memories old dummy my friend.