The Juggle is Real
I find myself daily feeling frustrated at the fact I haven’t been able to do everything I planned…Complete all of my outstanding work tasks, the food shop, the washing, a workout, prepping meals for the week, going for a walk, speaking with a friend, time with my husband, finally reading the book that has sat on my bedside table for 700 years.
Writing the list of my “top to do’s” got me thinking; do some of these really matter enough for me to beat myself up about not doing them? The firm answer is no. Some of them I class as important and that keep me healthy and happy (working out, walking, eating well and spending time with loves ones). The others like housework, my endless list of “work tasks” that fall into the miscellaneous section, often pile up and just feel like you can’t see the end of them.
The fact is, there isn’t an end to many of them (I didn’t like writing that sentence). Housework just exists. It needs to be done but it’s not a top priority. Keeping on top of things differs greatly from making things essential. I have changed my view on this several times over the years after been very controlled over my housework, when it was to be done, in the way it was done and it ruled me to some extent. Becoming a parent really changed that. I prioritise differently. I know what must be done and I know what can wait. I make the call as to whether or not time with my family or myself is more important. It’s quite liberating when you can but sometimes, the thought of everything else I could/should be doing, ruins the time I am meant to be enjoying.
I feel social media and general chit chat among others, can lead you to thinking you are never doing enough. There is always going to be someone doing more, achieving (what looks like) more but we never, ever know the full story being their picture. Everyone finds the juggle hard. Because it is hard. being a parent, a partner, a friend, a colleague, a human is a big gig. We deserve the headspace to acknowledge that and go a little easy on ourselves, as well as others. A priority to you doesn’t need to be the same to someone else, and likewise.
I try and remind myself of the below when things seem extra WOW. Please note, I don’t have it all together, I am a riot at times and resemble the Tasmanian devil trying to whizz through my 14 mile long to do list. This blog is a way of me holding myself accountable to what I preach. I don’t always get it right but the most important thing is I am trying.
Is it really that important? The answer is often no. Expectation and over committing often lead to feeling like you haven’t enough time to do things. I try to prioritize better and just park the stuff that is a nice to have/not important, for time when I have the space.
Does it/Will it make me happy? Clyde, my husband, fresh air, good food and exercise are just a few of the things that bring me joy. If I’m feeling overwhelmed trying to work out what needs my attention and time, I refer to this and it’s always easier to decide.
Am I putting too much pressure on myself? This is a tough one. We need to cut ourselves more slack and we are in control of doing that. We can’t often control what other’s expect to some extent so focus on what you can control and be kind to yourself. If you are not, others will take you for granted too.
